Where do we go from here?
Sunday, September 19, 2010
The Disconnection
After my post the other day on the attempt to rescue my mind, I found this post by a friend on - yes - Facebook. It's called How to Disconnect from Your Online Life, and comes from the BBC. Apparently I am far from the only one with the problem. It is my current intention to do more blog reading and writing, although I don't intend to sign up with "the Suicide Machine" and "kill" my FB "avatar persona," whom, I think, is pretty much my real life persona. I've even made some real friends, as opposed to virtual ones, via the social networking, which I count as a real plus. Kind of scary though that there are young people in the world now whose "entire life has been lived online." Yikes.
Okay, off this chair, away from this screen right now. Out into the so-called Real World.
A Post Script on 9/20 - as I seem to be riding a wave: Is The Internet Making You Lose Your Mind? My question exactly. And the answer seems to be a possible yes.
Okay, off this chair, away from this screen right now. Out into the so-called Real World.
A Post Script on 9/20 - as I seem to be riding a wave: Is The Internet Making You Lose Your Mind? My question exactly. And the answer seems to be a possible yes.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Trying to Rescue My Mind
To my astonishment I discover it has been well over a month since I posted anything in this blog. I have missed writing more than a phrase at a time, as one does on Facebook - but Facebook is the perfect enabler for someone with the brand of attention deficit disorder I seem to have in a very serious way. My ADD takes the form of being interested, nay fascinated, in way too many things. I am spellbound by gardening, cooking, food, politics, the politics of food, birds, travel, ecology, the emerging world of sustainability in all things we humans need and do, wildlife and its protection, literature, poetry, art, hiking, kayaking, and many many more. On Facebook I can flash from one to another of these subjects, read posts, write posts, click on links, "like" new and wonderful pages and websites - a bit of pollen here, a drop of nectar there, never taking the time to really absorb anything or read it to the end. The Internet offered too much of this mode of communication and learning already, and then I fell into a social network. Doom.
I'm not writing in my blogs, not reading other people's blogs (okay, I AM reading my niece Jessica's blog with lots of pictures - to keep up with her life with two small children, a three year old and a new baby - it's so wonderful and funny, I am addicted), not reading many articles in any deep or thorough way, fear I am going to lose the ability to write in complete sentences, let alone put them together into paragraphs. The saving grace is books, real ones, that I can hold in my hand and read as far away from the computer as I can get.(I fear the Kindle and its kind would be the last straws for me - so, no.) Since my last post whining about having nothing that I felt like reading, I have found reading matter to keep me occupied. One fabulous novel (probably more slanted towards female readers than male, though by no means "chick lit") by Dana Sachs, called If You Lived Here. was one of the best contemporary novels I have ever read. Everyone to whom I have recommended it agrees. Unfortunately I followed it with one of my favorite writer's latest book - Louise Erdrich's Shadow Tag. This is a brilliant book, but a deeply painful and disturbing one. I could not put it down, but this story of a marriage in shreds and flames left me shattered and bleeding. The review to which I link is an accurate expression of my own thoughts and opinion on the book - so I think I'll leave it at that.
Currently I have embarked on a Ursula K. Le Guin reading binge, starting with a book of her essays called The Language of the Night, which led me into the first volume of one her young adult series, Gifts. I hope to escape for a while from both this world of teabaggers and discord in which we are all living, as well as my own scattered and disordered world of interests and passions. I will weed, rake leaves, turn compost and live vicariously for a while in another world. If I can just stay off Facebook.
I'm not writing in my blogs, not reading other people's blogs (okay, I AM reading my niece Jessica's blog with lots of pictures - to keep up with her life with two small children, a three year old and a new baby - it's so wonderful and funny, I am addicted), not reading many articles in any deep or thorough way, fear I am going to lose the ability to write in complete sentences, let alone put them together into paragraphs. The saving grace is books, real ones, that I can hold in my hand and read as far away from the computer as I can get.(I fear the Kindle and its kind would be the last straws for me - so, no.) Since my last post whining about having nothing that I felt like reading, I have found reading matter to keep me occupied. One fabulous novel (probably more slanted towards female readers than male, though by no means "chick lit") by Dana Sachs, called If You Lived Here. was one of the best contemporary novels I have ever read. Everyone to whom I have recommended it agrees. Unfortunately I followed it with one of my favorite writer's latest book - Louise Erdrich's Shadow Tag. This is a brilliant book, but a deeply painful and disturbing one. I could not put it down, but this story of a marriage in shreds and flames left me shattered and bleeding. The review to which I link is an accurate expression of my own thoughts and opinion on the book - so I think I'll leave it at that.
Currently I have embarked on a Ursula K. Le Guin reading binge, starting with a book of her essays called The Language of the Night, which led me into the first volume of one her young adult series, Gifts. I hope to escape for a while from both this world of teabaggers and discord in which we are all living, as well as my own scattered and disordered world of interests and passions. I will weed, rake leaves, turn compost and live vicariously for a while in another world. If I can just stay off Facebook.
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Monday, August 09, 2010
Reading Matters
I had a "page" on this blog that I called "Reading," but I consistently forgot to write there about what I was reading; and a few days ago while attempting to catch up on it I somehow managed to completely delete it. Nobody looks at those Pages anyhow, so, I think I will just write in the blog itself when I feel like discussing what I am reading. Or, not reading. I'm currently having a very hard time settling into anything that really grabs me. Wonder if others have those strange blank spells.? Nothing you pick up, no matter how great the reviews, or enticing the cover, grabs you and makes you want to turn the pages. It's kind of a Reader's Block, instead of Writer's Block. The book for our neighborhood book club, meeting tomorrow evening, is The Art of Racing in the Rain, by Garth Stein, which I declined to read. It is narrated by a charming and personable dog, and after Gail (who very seldom cries) finished the book in heaving sobs, I knew I was going to skip it. Since childhood (remember Old Yeller?) I have avoided dog books - their sole purpose is to break the reader's heart. Our own crazy little old dog's death is still too recent for me to risk waking up that pain.
We recently found Sea of Troubles, in a new paperback reprint. It's one of Donna Leon's Venice mysteries that has been, mysteriously, unavailable for far too long, and I devoured it in a couple of nights. There are two others that seem to be missing, and I'm hoping they're next in line to return. If you love a good police procedural, captivating protagonists, great food, and exiting locations, Leon's series of books with Commissario Guido Brunetti will be right up your alley. I have never been to Venice, but from these books I feel I know it, in its contemporary form at least. It's clear from these novels that Italy has its share of the woes and tribulations of modern life, but the beauty of this ancient city also manages to shine through. Many of the mysteries have to do with environmental problems, and political corruption, as well as immigration problems. All things we are familiar with and think of as our own national difficulties. But, after I finished with Sea of Troubles, I was right back into my lack of enthusiasm for anything I pick up to read. I have things on hold with the library system, but lack of funding has forced them to seriously cut back on the number of copies they order, and it can take weeks and weeks to get a popular book.
So, while I wait for my holds on the latest titles by Jane Smiley, Anna Quindlen, Scott Turow, James Lee Burke, Sharon McCrumb, and others, I am desultorily picking at one unread volume or another off our shelves. We are trying not to buy books right now, so it's the long hard wait, unless I lose control completely and find myself at the register at Bookworks with a stack of new books in my arms. Anyone have any suggestions?
So, while I wait for my holds on the latest titles by Jane Smiley, Anna Quindlen, Scott Turow, James Lee Burke, Sharon McCrumb, and others, I am desultorily picking at one unread volume or another off our shelves. We are trying not to buy books right now, so it's the long hard wait, unless I lose control completely and find myself at the register at Bookworks with a stack of new books in my arms. Anyone have any suggestions?
Sunday, August 08, 2010
Poem For the Day
Cherry Tomatoes
by Anne Higgins

Suddenly it is August again, so hot,
breathless heat.
I sit on the ground
in the garden of Carmel,
picking ripe cherry tomatoes
and eating them.
They are so ripe that the skin is split,
so warm and sweet
from the attentions of the sun,
the juice bursts in my mouth,
an ecstatic taste,
and I feel that I am in the mouth of summer,
sloshing in the saliva of August.
Hummingbirds halo me there,
in the great green silence,
and my own bursting heart
splits me with life.
(Thanks to Garrison Keillor and The Writer's Almanac)
Thursday, August 05, 2010
Still In The Garden
The monsoons seem to be affecting other parts of NM much more than they are us here in Albuquerque. Other parts of the state have actually had flooding, whereas I am happy if my rain barrels fill up at least halfway. Things have perked up, though, and I recently read the reason that our rains make the plants so much happier than water out of the hose, even when mixed with fertilizer. The rains are nitrogen-rich, especially when they fall during a thunder storm, and nitrogen helps plants grow, develop and reproduce. So, whether it's from the rains or the fish emulsion, or what, everything in the yard is looking healthy and happy. Even, or maybe especially?, the weeds. Tomatoes and cucumbers are coming on strong, arugula has recovered from the snail attacks, and all the herbs are gigantic. I was sad when the vitex blooms were over, as I'd waited for them all spring, but my sadness quickly dissipated when early one morning I saw a flock of goldfinches chowing on the seeds of the spent blooms, just the way they do on the sunflower heads full of seeds.
We are so fortunate not to be suffering the heat wave that other parts of the country have. I read the weather forecast for anyplace I have loved ones, and reading the Dallas weather is beginning to scare me. I called a friend there this morning, just to be sure her AC was working, and she was okay. My sister (also in Dallas) got what she calls a tacky, redneck, aboveground pool in June, when temps in that city first went to, and stayed 100 degrees or more. I think the whole family is staying in the pool around the clock, with heat indices of 110 and over currently. Most of the country, except the West, is going through this heat horror, but I'm still waiting to hear Jim Inhofe and others like him get behind calling this global climate change. They were plenty quick to scoff at what they still call "global warming" when the country was drowning in blizzards and freak winter storms - sure, easy to mock "warming" when it's pouring snow and you're wearing every warm garment you own. But, why are they so quiet about this freaky deathly heat? I suggest that everyone in the country needs to read Bill McKibben's latest TomDispatch post, and Tom's intro to it: A Wilted Senate on a Heating Planet.
We are so fortunate not to be suffering the heat wave that other parts of the country have. I read the weather forecast for anyplace I have loved ones, and reading the Dallas weather is beginning to scare me. I called a friend there this morning, just to be sure her AC was working, and she was okay. My sister (also in Dallas) got what she calls a tacky, redneck, aboveground pool in June, when temps in that city first went to, and stayed 100 degrees or more. I think the whole family is staying in the pool around the clock, with heat indices of 110 and over currently. Most of the country, except the West, is going through this heat horror, but I'm still waiting to hear Jim Inhofe and others like him get behind calling this global climate change. They were plenty quick to scoff at what they still call "global warming" when the country was drowning in blizzards and freak winter storms - sure, easy to mock "warming" when it's pouring snow and you're wearing every warm garment you own. But, why are they so quiet about this freaky deathly heat? I suggest that everyone in the country needs to read Bill McKibben's latest TomDispatch post, and Tom's intro to it: A Wilted Senate on a Heating Planet.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Rain, Rain, Lovely Rain
After so much whining and bitching - both here and on Facebook - about our lack of rain, our dry and dusty life, my wretched thirsty gardens, I just thought I should write a short happy post about the wonderful weekend of rain, continuing into today, that we have had here in Albuquerque. According to one news station, yesterday's just-over-half-an-inch of rain was a record-setter for the day (shows you how little rain we get, doesn't it?). It is still, however, the second-dryest July on record. Oops, sounds like I'm moving back into the whining and bitching mode. Oh no, stop that right now.
My gratitude for this moisture is truly boundless, it has been the best weekend of the summer, for sure. I spent a lot of time sitting out under the back portal just watching the birds enjoy the weather, hopping in the yard, flying overhead in wild happy swoops, - reading, and breathing in the damp air, rehydrating body and soul. Gail and I went for a long walk yesterday in the rain, which is a slow and steady drizzle, really. We got wet, but it felt entirely wonderful. There were masses of wildflowers and grasses where we walked, and you could almost hear them saying aahhhhhhh. Showers and thunderstorms are forecast off and on for the entire week. My idea of an enormous gift. And as I sit here typing, it is raining yet again. The smell of rain is coming in the window fan, the rain barrels are filling, the plants are sinking their roots ever deeper. Life is good. (Photo of wildflowers and grasses, Phil Chacon Park Something wrong w/dater on my camera. I took this photo yesterday,)
My gratitude for this moisture is truly boundless, it has been the best weekend of the summer, for sure. I spent a lot of time sitting out under the back portal just watching the birds enjoy the weather, hopping in the yard, flying overhead in wild happy swoops, - reading, and breathing in the damp air, rehydrating body and soul. Gail and I went for a long walk yesterday in the rain, which is a slow and steady drizzle, really. We got wet, but it felt entirely wonderful. There were masses of wildflowers and grasses where we walked, and you could almost hear them saying aahhhhhhh. Showers and thunderstorms are forecast off and on for the entire week. My idea of an enormous gift. And as I sit here typing, it is raining yet again. The smell of rain is coming in the window fan, the rain barrels are filling, the plants are sinking their roots ever deeper. Life is good. (Photo of wildflowers and grasses, Phil Chacon Park Something wrong w/dater on my camera. I took this photo yesterday,)
Friday, July 23, 2010
More Thoughts From The Garden
Perhaps I should just rename this blog "Garden Thoughts." As those seem to be just about the only thoughts I have nowadays. I used to think about my classes, lesson plans, student problems, stuff like that. For many years I thought about those things. Of course, as always, I do think about things like the stupidity of the cranky right wing, Wall Street, Timothy Geitner, et al's objections to putting Elizabeth Warren in as head of the newly formed Consumer Financial Protection Board, the latest blatant lies and deception of those monsters running British Petroleum, the fact that this is on track to be the hottest year since anyone's been keeping track and that we're unlikely to see any sort of effective legislation to control climate change getting passed in my lifetime - stuff like that, yes. But really, during the active hours of the day, before it gets close to one hundred degrees in my yard, most of my thoughts have to do with what is living, even perhaps thriving, what looking droopy and discouraged, what could go in that empty space right over there, why the tithonia seeds I planted turned up their toes and croaked soon after sprouting (when last year the same plants, grown from seed, were the stars of my late summer garden), will I be able to find any aster plants to put in for fall? And many more ruminations in a similar vein. Actually, most of the time my thoughts are with the possibility that it is never going to rain again here in the NE quadrant of the city of Albuquerque.
Well, I began this post two days ago, and am just now getting back to it. Still hasn't rained here, though a friend on the outskirts of Grants up on the toes of Mt. Taylor reports a lovely "plant-loving" steady rain last night. So I guess, I'll go out and water for a while, continuing to wait and hope. Because I am watering, and feeling bad - but not as bad as the city golf course mangers should feel, at using water for this purpose, things actually aren't looking too bad. The sunflowers everywhere cheer me up every morning, the roses are finishing up their second bloom, all the sedums are happy as pigs in mud - I'm thinking of just sedums next summer, forget anything else. Okay, as many kinds of sunflowers and sages as I can manage as well. Also going to research native grasses, the tall waving kinds, for several places.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Garden Thoughts
Here in New Mexico rain is a precious thing. We have had no measureable precipitation in Albuquerque since May second. That's nearly two months now. It had gotten to the point where I was watering some of my plantings every darn day. So, when yesterday as I stepped out the door to head to work, the skies opened up and let loose with first hailstones then raindrops, I and every other gardener in the city whooped with joy. It rained all afternoon. It was still raining when my class was over and I headed across the parking lot to my car. It was still raining while we ate supper. It stopped long enough for a gorgeous break-in-the-clouds sunset, then rained off and on during the night. We opened up every window in the house to let in the cool wet breezes for the evening, and left the bedroom windows open all night. This morning when I went out to do my morning tour of gardens and planters it was like a new world. Everything was perky and happy, refreshed in the way that only rain can bring. All the watering and fertilizing in the world can't accomplish what one good long gentle rainstorm can.
So, I have brought in most of the remaining lettuces and lots of herbs. The greens are starting to bolt, they have reached their limit of heat tolerance. I think there is one more harvest of lettuce greens, but they will be pretty bitter. The arugula is growing apace, partly in the shade. I need to thin it, bring in the thinnings for a salad. In the past weeks of heat we have been eating salads just about all the time, varying them with sandwiches. Even toasting bread for sandwiches has been almost too much heating of the kitchen. We are impatient for the tomatoes and cucumbers to get busy and produce some fruit - but I have to keep reminding myself it's only the end of June. The tomatoes have blossoms, the cuke vines are strong and healthy but no blossoms yet. This year I haven't done too much with flowers, though the sunflowers and thithonia seedlings are getting ready for going into the ground. The maximilian sunflowers (perennial native sunflowers) have spread hugely across the back of the yard and once they bloom they will be magnificent. I lost some perennials over the very cold winter, and am taking my time deciding what to use for replacements. The agastaches and mallows are about ready to bloom, which should bring more hummingbirds back into the yard. What we've had lately are flocks of bushtits in the front yard, at the suet and in all the small trees and shrubs. They are such darling birds, so very busy and full of themselves. I'm thinking of a trip to High Desert Gardens either today or tomorrow, at least to stroll, observe, and think about what I'll buy next. Soon I will be a lady of leisure (more on that in another post) and have time time time for all the gardening I can stand.
So, I have brought in most of the remaining lettuces and lots of herbs. The greens are starting to bolt, they have reached their limit of heat tolerance. I think there is one more harvest of lettuce greens, but they will be pretty bitter. The arugula is growing apace, partly in the shade. I need to thin it, bring in the thinnings for a salad. In the past weeks of heat we have been eating salads just about all the time, varying them with sandwiches. Even toasting bread for sandwiches has been almost too much heating of the kitchen. We are impatient for the tomatoes and cucumbers to get busy and produce some fruit - but I have to keep reminding myself it's only the end of June. The tomatoes have blossoms, the cuke vines are strong and healthy but no blossoms yet. This year I haven't done too much with flowers, though the sunflowers and thithonia seedlings are getting ready for going into the ground. The maximilian sunflowers (perennial native sunflowers) have spread hugely across the back of the yard and once they bloom they will be magnificent. I lost some perennials over the very cold winter, and am taking my time deciding what to use for replacements. The agastaches and mallows are about ready to bloom, which should bring more hummingbirds back into the yard. What we've had lately are flocks of bushtits in the front yard, at the suet and in all the small trees and shrubs. They are such darling birds, so very busy and full of themselves. I'm thinking of a trip to High Desert Gardens either today or tomorrow, at least to stroll, observe, and think about what I'll buy next. Soon I will be a lady of leisure (more on that in another post) and have time time time for all the gardening I can stand.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Hands Across The Sand
If you live, work, or play anywhere near a large body of water you may run into some crowds tomorrow around eleven a.m. your timezone. That's when the event being called Hands Across The Sand is taking place on beaches and shorelines all over the world. From the Grist article about the event:
Saturday could bring the biggest public demonstration yet about the Gulf oil gusher, when Hands Across the Sand gathers people on beaches around the world at noon to hold hands in support of coastal economies, oceans, marine wildlife, and fishing industries.Organized by surfer and Florida restaurant owner Dave Rauschkolb, the dispersed event looks to be aiming for a surfer zen vibe, as opposed to the angry demonstrations against BP that have arisen in New Orleans and elsewhere. (The precedent, fellow young folks, is the 1986 Hands Across America chain.)
Even here in the desert we will be participating. Here in Albuquerque we will be holding hands on the Bosque Bike Path that follows the Rio Grande, and on the old Alameda Walking Bridge across the Rio. The Rio Grande empties into the Gulf of Mexico, and is therefore a wonderfully appropriate place to share in this protest. I don't know if I can pull off a "surfer zen vibe," but Gail and I will add ourselves to the numbers gathering to make our voices heard across this planet. I know it's late notice, but if you feel that we need to begin now (actually we needed to begin thirty years ago, but we'll take what we can get) working for a clean energy future that doesn't include ill-regulated freeform off-shore drilling, then check the Hands Across The Sand website map for your closest location. All hands on deck, or on the sand, the bridge, the edge of the pond in your local park.
Wednesday, June 02, 2010
Natural Delights
In addition to wasting far too much time on Facebook, as mentioned in the previous post, I have been spending most of the spring outside. Mainly outside in my own immediate surroundings. The first spring task was to get rid of the weeds that sprang up in great profusion in the yard/gardens as a result of a somewhat wetter winter than we often have. We managed to get most of that done before it began to warm up to summer levels. It was a cool though hideously windy spring, and the spinach and chard that I planted in the late fall have continued to thrive. In addition to those two I now have four different varieties of lettuce, cilantro, basil, as well as lots of perennial herbs in profusion: sage, thymes, chives, tarragon. We are rapidly moving into summer heat - by the weekend it will be at least one hundred degrees, maybe a little higher by Sunday and Monday. So we are living on salads, sandwiches full of vegetables, and smoothies. The kitchen gets so hot in this weather, that I can't even bear to turn on the stove. The Growers' Markets are opening now, so there are loads of local produce available, in addition to the salad fixins in my own back yard. I've planted tomatoes and cucumbers too, but it will be a good while before they show up. Exciting news is that Deborah Madison's new cookbook is finally out.titled Seasonal Fruit Desserts: From Orchard, Farm and Market, it's one that I've been eagerly awaiting. It will be awhile til I can afford it, but I can drool over it in bookstores, pick up some ideas while browsing. There is so much gorgeous fruit available now, we have been inventing our own dessert delights - strawberries and watermelon in ginger sauce, mangoes and oranges with mint and lime, to name just a couple. Nothing fancy, but cool and delicious.
Facebook Ate My Brain.
I have been MIA from blogging for far too long now. I think Facebook is to blame. It seems to have eaten my brain. It's just too easy to spend a lot of time there, not really writing, or even thinking. But I have to say I love it. I have reconnected with many people from past layers of my life; people I actually cared about, but since my life has always been quite peripatetic, I lost touch with classmates, friends, students, as I segued from one location/job/lover/incarnation, to the next. So, oddly, part of what I am enjoying on FB is the Search. It speaks to the detective that has lived in me since the Nancy Drew years, and is evidently alive and thriving. In addition to finding misplaced people from my past, I have also connected with an immediate community right here in Albuquerque, many of whom are very involved in local politics, others devoted to local gardening. These are communities with which I can interface (can we believe I actually used that word in that way??) in real time and space, some may in fact become Real, as opposed to FB, Friends. So, if you're on FB and I don't know it yet, come visit over there. I'm a shameless hussy for collecting more new friends, as well as getting back in touch with previous ones.
Friday, May 07, 2010
The City of New Orleans
On this morning's Writer's Almanac, Garrison Keillor has this wonderful little literary musing on the city of New Orleans (the place, not the song that celebrates the train by that name). I particularly love the Truman Capote quote here, and want to find the essay from which it's taken. I have spent a lot of time thinking about the Gulf states in the past couple of weeks since the Deep Horizon disaster. I love this part of the country, for so many reasons. It is unique, and beautiful, and has suffered so much in recent years. I post this here as a small tribute, with thanks to Mr. Keillor.
On this day in 1718, the French Canadian Jean-Baptiste Le Moyne de Bienville discovered the city that would come to be called Crescent City, the Big Easy, and the City That Care Forgot. But he called it La Nouvelle Orléans, New Orleans, named for Philippe d'Orléans, the Regent of France.
New Orleans is famous as the birthplace of jazz, and for producing many great musicians, including Louis Armstrong, Fats Domino, Mahalia Jackson, Harry Connick Jr., and Wynton Marsalis.
But New Orleans also has a rich literary history. It is sometimes called "the least American city" because it has such a distinctive feel, and for years writers have struggled to put New Orleans into words. David Simon, the writer and creator of the new HBO series set in New Orleans, "Treme," described how impossible it was to explain the city to an outsider. He said that he and his co-writer, Eric Overmyer, "imagined the pitch meeting, and we imagined trying to explain New Orleans and being unable to. If I could explain it to you sitting here now, I wouldn't have to do the show. That's the problem: you literally have to drag whatever executive you've got to New Orleans, throw him into a second line, get him drunk, take him here, take him there. It would have to be a lost week: you're not in America anymore — you're in New Orleans! We couldn't imagine being able to do that."
John Kennedy Toole was a New Orleans writer, born in 1937. Most people don't recognize his name, but the title of his only novel is famous: A Confederacy of Dunces (1980). He grew up an only child, with a domineering mother who was convinced that her son was a genius and controlled his life. Although his father worked as a car salesman and mechanic, they lived in a nice part of town and his mother had illusions of grandeur — she was from an old New Orleans family, her great-grandfather a hero in the Battle of New Orleans.
Truman Capote (books by this author) was born in New Orleans in 1924. His mother was 16 years old, a beauty queen, and his father was a nonpracticing lawyer, and his parents lived together in a hotel and soon sent the boy to Alabama to be raised by aunts and cousins. But he spent part of every summer in New Orleans while he was growing up. He dropped out of school as a teenager, went to New York, and made it his adopted home. He went back to New Orleans briefly to start his first book, Other Voices, Other Rooms (1948). And he wrote about it in his essay "New Orleans," which begins:
"In the courtyard there was an angel of black stone, and its angel head rose above giant elephant leaves; the stark glass angel eyes, bright as the bleached blue of sailor eyes, stared upward. One observed the angel from an intricate green balcony — mine, this balcony, for I lived beyond in three old white rooms, rooms with elaborate wedding-cake ceilings, wide sliding doors, tall French windows. On warm evenings, with these windows open, conversation was pleasant there, tuneful, for wind rustled the interior like fan-breeze made by ancient ladies. And on such warm evenings this town is quiet. Only voices: family talk weaving on an ivy-curtained porch; a barefoot woman humming as she rocks a sidewalk chair, lulling to sleep a baby she nurses quite publicly; the complaining foreign tongue of an irritated lady who, sitting on her balcony, plucks a fryer, the loosened feathers floating from her hands, slipping into air, sliding lazily downward."
Anne Rice (books by this author) was born in New Orleans in 1941, and sets her popular novels there — she is particularly famous as the author The Vampire Chronicles, beginning with Interview with the Vampire (1976).
The playwright Tennessee Williams, born in Mississippi in 1911, made New Orleans his adopted home, and had such a profound effect on the community that the annual literary festival is known as the Tennessee Williams/New Orleans Literary Festival. In A Streetcar Named Desire, Blanche says, "Don't you just love those long rainy afternoons in New Orleans when an hour isn't just an hour — but a little piece of eternity dropped into your hands — and who knows what to do with it?"
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Reflections
Sorry to borrow the title for this post from you, Cynthia, but it was exactly the right word.
I do apologize for obsessing about the Poem A Day thing, but I have truly been obsessed with it for this entire month. It has been a mental challenge, and a good one. I think that by doing it I have worked through some things: my feelings of regret and sorrow over this move - the anger with myself that I have had for the past four years since we did it, grief over the deaths and losses that have happened during this time. The way I have hated being here, refused to open myself up to the good things about this place and our life here. Days spent mostly in the yard cleaning up gardens, welcoming spring, planning what I'll do in the gardens once this cataract surgery business is over and I can see clearly, work freely - these have been days spent thinking poetry all the time. I write in my head for the most part, no words get processed or put on paper until they have flowed through my mind for quite a while, been discarded, rearranged, reimagined. So the birds, trees, flowers, dirt, weeds, and compost have been my companions and inspiration for most of the month. I could only wish that it had been possible to take a beach walk now and then. But walks along the river have substituted pretty well.
Right now I'm hoping to be able to do the last two prompts, for days 29 and 30. Twenty nine, tomorrow, should still be possible - but as I'll have the first (left eye) cataract surgery on Friday, a poem for the thirtieth may have to wait a few days. The doctor's office can't seem to tell me (they say they won't know until the first checkup, on Saturday morning) whether I'll be able to read and write well enough to use the computer. The final part of this is choosing my five best efforts to send in to Robert Lee Brewer before May 5th. I've been working on trying to make this choice - and it's not easy. There are clearly quite a few that I won't choose, but the truth is that there are more than five that I feel pretty good about. Anyone who'd like to help with this choice is welcome to go to Poetic License and leave your opinion. It would be doing me a big favor.
I do apologize for obsessing about the Poem A Day thing, but I have truly been obsessed with it for this entire month. It has been a mental challenge, and a good one. I think that by doing it I have worked through some things: my feelings of regret and sorrow over this move - the anger with myself that I have had for the past four years since we did it, grief over the deaths and losses that have happened during this time. The way I have hated being here, refused to open myself up to the good things about this place and our life here. Days spent mostly in the yard cleaning up gardens, welcoming spring, planning what I'll do in the gardens once this cataract surgery business is over and I can see clearly, work freely - these have been days spent thinking poetry all the time. I write in my head for the most part, no words get processed or put on paper until they have flowed through my mind for quite a while, been discarded, rearranged, reimagined. So the birds, trees, flowers, dirt, weeds, and compost have been my companions and inspiration for most of the month. I could only wish that it had been possible to take a beach walk now and then. But walks along the river have substituted pretty well.
Right now I'm hoping to be able to do the last two prompts, for days 29 and 30. Twenty nine, tomorrow, should still be possible - but as I'll have the first (left eye) cataract surgery on Friday, a poem for the thirtieth may have to wait a few days. The doctor's office can't seem to tell me (they say they won't know until the first checkup, on Saturday morning) whether I'll be able to read and write well enough to use the computer. The final part of this is choosing my five best efforts to send in to Robert Lee Brewer before May 5th. I've been working on trying to make this choice - and it's not easy. There are clearly quite a few that I won't choose, but the truth is that there are more than five that I feel pretty good about. Anyone who'd like to help with this choice is welcome to go to Poetic License and leave your opinion. It would be doing me a big favor.
Monday, April 26, 2010
New Home For My Poetry Challenge Efforts.
I thank with brief thanksgiving whatever gods may be that this month is almost over. Thirty poems in thirty days. And we're only on number 26 right now. Moving these poems around from place to place has been almost as exhausting as writing them in the first place. Finally what I have done is create a whole new blog for them, it's called Poetic License and it's here.
Unfortunately it starts with Day 1 and goes on chronologically to the current effort. But, if you know where you stopped reading them, you can just look in the sidebar and find your place. This is the very last fooling around with this I'm going to do, and I want to thank the faithful few who have been reading my attempts at this Challenge. And welcome any newcomers.
Unfortunately it starts with Day 1 and goes on chronologically to the current effort. But, if you know where you stopped reading them, you can just look in the sidebar and find your place. This is the very last fooling around with this I'm going to do, and I want to thank the faithful few who have been reading my attempts at this Challenge. And welcome any newcomers.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
In Defense Of Looking Back
The Poem A Day Challenge rages on, and there's still a week to go. I have been keeping up, though not publicly posting my efforts. There is one prompt I haven't been able to write from - though I am still working on it. After agonizing for the first couple of weeks, I realized that thirty poems couldn't all be torn from my heart, and I might as well have some fun now and then. So, I had fun with yesterday's prompt, which was either "Looking Back" or "Not Looking Back." I got very maudlin with a couple of attempts, personally and regretfully looking back, but then as I was pruning the big Russian Sage out front, one of story-telling's most famous lookers-back popped into my mind. And this is the result:
In Defense of Looking Back
Don’t look at me like that.
I know you think me cowardly,
Call me slow and weak.
If you had ever loved this way
You would have done the same.
Half mad with grief and loss
All I wanted was to touch her,
Look at her once more.
I thought I’d saved her from the Underworld.
I didn’t know the fury of the gods.
How could I not look back?
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
On Vision
I was browsing through my old private AOL Journal (exported to Blogger - or should that be imported? - when AOL Journals closed) yesterday, and happily came across this poem by Lisel Mueller that I had included in a post there. I'm not sure why I included it then, except that I loved it, and had seen an exhibit of Monet's paintings from his old age in New Orleans some years ago - the poem helped me understand the paintings, made me love Monet even more. I'm not sure how historically based the poem may be - much of what I've read tells me he struggled against the growing blurriness of vision and loss of color perception caused by his cataracts. In any case, I know I'm certainly struggling with mine. As a visual artist Monet was dependent on his vision, but he used even his aberrant perception in his waning years to put his impressions on canvas. It was his loss of color more than loss of the sharp outlines that distressed him; But I'm finding it very hard to live without those edges. My opthamologist tells me I probably won't have to wear glasses for distance vision after the operations, and perhaps only nonprescription reading glasses. It all seems much too amazing to believe, for someone who's worn glasses for almost sixty years - since she was seven years old, and now wears bifocals. It's interesting to note that Claude Monet did have The Operation, in 1923, three years before his death.
Monet Refuses The Operation
Doctor, you say there are no haloes
around the streetlights in Paris
and what I see is an aberration
caused by old age, an affliction.
I tell you it has taken me all my life
to arrive at the vision of gas lamps as angels,
to soften and blur and finally banish
the edges you regret I don't see,
to learn that the line I called the horizon
does not exist and sky and water,
so long apart, are the same state of being.
Fifty-four years before I could see
Rouen cathedral is built
of parallel shafts of sun,
and now you want to restore
my youthful errors: fixed
notions of top and bottom,
the illusion of three-dimensional space,
wisteria separate
from the bridge it covers.
What can I say to convince you
the Houses of Parliament dissolves
night after night to become
the fluid dream of the Thames?
I will not return to a universe
of objects that don't know each other,
as if islands were not the lost children
of one great continent. The world
is flux, and light becomes what it touches,
becomes water, lilies on water,
above and below water,
becomes lilac and mauve and yellow
and white and cerulean lamps,
small fists passing sunlight
so quickly to one another
that it would take long, streaming hair
inside my brush to catch it.
To paint the speed of light!
Our weighted shapes, these verticals,
burn to mix with air
and change our bones, skin, clothes
to gases. Doctor,
if only you could see
how heaven pulls earth into its arms
and how infinitely the heart expands
to claim this world, blue vapor without end.
Lisel Mueller
Monet Refuses The Operation
Doctor, you say there are no haloes
around the streetlights in Paris
and what I see is an aberration
caused by old age, an affliction.
I tell you it has taken me all my life
to arrive at the vision of gas lamps as angels,
to soften and blur and finally banish
the edges you regret I don't see,
to learn that the line I called the horizon
does not exist and sky and water,
so long apart, are the same state of being.
Fifty-four years before I could see
Rouen cathedral is built
of parallel shafts of sun,
and now you want to restore
my youthful errors: fixed
notions of top and bottom,
the illusion of three-dimensional space,
wisteria separate
from the bridge it covers.
What can I say to convince you
the Houses of Parliament dissolves
night after night to become
the fluid dream of the Thames?
I will not return to a universe
of objects that don't know each other,
as if islands were not the lost children
of one great continent. The world
is flux, and light becomes what it touches,
becomes water, lilies on water,
above and below water,
becomes lilac and mauve and yellow
and white and cerulean lamps,
small fists passing sunlight
so quickly to one another
that it would take long, streaming hair
inside my brush to catch it.
To paint the speed of light!
Our weighted shapes, these verticals,
burn to mix with air
and change our bones, skin, clothes
to gases. Doctor,
if only you could see
how heaven pulls earth into its arms
and how infinitely the heart expands
to claim this world, blue vapor without end.
Lisel Mueller
Thursday, April 15, 2010
The Eyes Will Have It
I don't know if spring has been the death of blogging for me, or if I should blame it on Facebook. Or the Poem A Day Challenge. Whatever the cause, my impetus to blog has been in serious death throes for a while now. The end of the term is of course another likely culprit. Facebook has been a real entertainment, but it's beginning to wane. Spring calls me out of the house every day until the day gets too hot, to get things cleaned up, weeded, cut back, planted, ad infinitum. It is so utterly spring here now, the fresh green leaves of the big cottonwood outside the kitchen window greet me every morning and make me smile even before I get the coffee going. The redbud and the lilacs are glorious right now, irises blooming a rich deep purple. I just cut the remainder of my winter greens, some chard and spinach, for a stirfry tonight.
I won't be able to do much in the garden, at least of the bending, stooping, lifting sort (and what other sort is there?) for a while soon, as the next milestone on my life journey is coming up in two weeks. I've been procrastinating about an eye doctor visit much too long, but very aware how blurry my vision was becoming. I thought I just needed new glasses. But no, I need new eyes. And so, I'm having cataract surgery, both eyes, one eye at a time, the first one on the thirtieth of this month. Everyone tells me I'll be so happy once it's over, that it's like a miracle, and other exuberant forms of propaganda, but I'm fairly freaked out about it nonetheless. Blog readers who have already been through this - I'd love to hear your experiences. One of my sisters has had one eye done, and she is in the "it's like a miracle" camp, and she doesn't suffer medical procedures lightly. I dreamed last night that I found an old pair of glasses in some stuff I was going through, and they were perfect, I could see absolutely clearly and was so happy because it meant I wouldn't need to have the cataracts removed. Perhaps the glasses stand for the lenses I'll have IN my eyes once it's all over, or perhaps it's just about how nervous I am. (Cross-posted to Women On)
I won't be able to do much in the garden, at least of the bending, stooping, lifting sort (and what other sort is there?) for a while soon, as the next milestone on my life journey is coming up in two weeks. I've been procrastinating about an eye doctor visit much too long, but very aware how blurry my vision was becoming. I thought I just needed new glasses. But no, I need new eyes. And so, I'm having cataract surgery, both eyes, one eye at a time, the first one on the thirtieth of this month. Everyone tells me I'll be so happy once it's over, that it's like a miracle, and other exuberant forms of propaganda, but I'm fairly freaked out about it nonetheless. Blog readers who have already been through this - I'd love to hear your experiences. One of my sisters has had one eye done, and she is in the "it's like a miracle" camp, and she doesn't suffer medical procedures lightly. I dreamed last night that I found an old pair of glasses in some stuff I was going through, and they were perfect, I could see absolutely clearly and was so happy because it meant I wouldn't need to have the cataracts removed. Perhaps the glasses stand for the lenses I'll have IN my eyes once it's all over, or perhaps it's just about how nervous I am. (Cross-posted to Women On)
Friday, April 09, 2010
Now We Wait And See
Later the same day: Thinking of the hummers must have been an inspiration. I've been struggling with Day 8 of the Poem A Day Challenge since yesterday morning. Knew where I was going, but couldn't figure out just how to get there. I think I've got it now, this afternoon.
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
Vuelo De Las Brujas, by Franciso de Goya Y Lucientes PAD #6
Although I wasn't going to post any more of these on this actual blog, I can't help but share this one here. The prompt at first made me say "OK, this is the day I give up." Here it is:
"For this prompt, write an ekphrastic poem. According to John Drury's The Poetry Dictionary, ekphrastic poetry is "Poetry that imitates, describes, critiques, dramatizes, reflects upon, or otherwise responds to a work of nonliterary art, especially the visual." So, I've provided links to two pieces of art, and I want you to pick one (or both) to write an ekphrastic poem. (It would be helpful for you to mention which art you picked.)"
The Witches Entertainment
There is no moon tonight
and cloudcast hides the stars.
Put on your hats, my beauties,
soon we ride
skyclad
across the darkling Spanish plain,
seeking louts who wander
from the taverns in the town
wanting only
the warmth of their own beds,
fire on the hearth,
a sodden night of sleep
too drunk for dreams.
We shall remake them
fly them,
dumb creatures of the earth,
to ecstasy and terror in our arms.
By hidden light of dark day stars
cross tossing stormy seas
to visit cannibals
eaters of human hearts.
Then drop them
bloody, riven, gnawed
through forest leaves.
They will hear music
played by monsters
around a ring of fire
deep within the midnight trees
dance with us
strange sisters,
then sleep
abandoning despair.
From unreasoning sleep awakening
they will not remember.
Will not care
"For this prompt, write an ekphrastic poem. According to John Drury's The Poetry Dictionary, ekphrastic poetry is "Poetry that imitates, describes, critiques, dramatizes, reflects upon, or otherwise responds to a work of nonliterary art, especially the visual." So, I've provided links to two pieces of art, and I want you to pick one (or both) to write an ekphrastic poem. (It would be helpful for you to mention which art you picked.)"
- Pocahontas, by Annie Leibovitz
- Flight of the Witches, by Francisco de Goya
The Witches Entertainment
There is no moon tonight
and cloudcast hides the stars.
Put on your hats, my beauties,
soon we ride
skyclad
across the darkling Spanish plain,
seeking louts who wander
from the taverns in the town
wanting only
the warmth of their own beds,
fire on the hearth,
a sodden night of sleep
too drunk for dreams.
We shall remake them
fly them,
dumb creatures of the earth,
to ecstasy and terror in our arms.
By hidden light of dark day stars
cross tossing stormy seas
to visit cannibals
eaters of human hearts.
Then drop them
bloody, riven, gnawed
through forest leaves.
They will hear music
played by monsters
around a ring of fire
deep within the midnight trees
dance with us
strange sisters,
then sleep
abandoning despair.
From unreasoning sleep awakening
they will not remember.
Will not care
Monday, April 05, 2010
In The Garden
Damn this Poem A Day Challenge, it's kept me in the house for far too long. So, I spent this morning in the yard, and going right back out there while I can. I've been watering everything; the back is done but I need to get out into the front before the winds start blowing. We are under a wind advisory for the afternoon, and it is supposed to be almost eighty. Not weather to encourage shy young sprouts. The redbud tree is starting to blossom, and the irises we freeloaded when a neighbor thinned hers out two years ago are finally going to bloom. I think there are things that didn't make it through the winter, but I'm waiting a while longer to be sure. I don't know if it's too cold here for the salvia leucantha, but none of them seem to be showing signs of life.
I was surprised when we moved out here in spring of 2006 to see the profusion of lilacs blooming everywhere in ABQ and Santa Fe. There was one small and stunted lilac in our backyard, which has only had a few blooms in the intervening years. This year it is entirely covered with buds, covered, I tell you, and it, along with the irises, is giving me a reason to live a while longer. Okay, and also I saw my first tiger swallowtail in the front yard yesterday afternoon. Black-chinned hummers have been sighted in the Bosque, so I have to look out my feeders, get some filled and hung on the patio. Too busy to go to work, it looks like - spring has sprung.
I was surprised when we moved out here in spring of 2006 to see the profusion of lilacs blooming everywhere in ABQ and Santa Fe. There was one small and stunted lilac in our backyard, which has only had a few blooms in the intervening years. This year it is entirely covered with buds, covered, I tell you, and it, along with the irises, is giving me a reason to live a while longer. Okay, and also I saw my first tiger swallowtail in the front yard yesterday afternoon. Black-chinned hummers have been sighted in the Bosque, so I have to look out my feeders, get some filled and hung on the patio. Too busy to go to work, it looks like - spring has sprung.
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